Day 300 out of ward(348 on medications)

I woke up late today at 9a.m like that, my medicine late too but I do not hear voices. I dreamt a lot today but I don't remember my dreams, it was a worrying kind of dream the feelings I remember. Now it's 9.39a.m and I'm writing this blog, haven't showered yet today.

I go downstairs after I woke up to shop to buy a Redbull and smoke a stick of cigarette, I feel better and stronger when I smoke I hope the feelings lasts but it only comes back when I smoke again then I'm worried like if I will really quit smoking because I want to study hard then I really don't know what's going to happen to my life.

My mother went to bukit gombak then to my nenek's house I think, I hope she buy waker chicken today I really don't know if she will.

Today I feel good and better reminded me of the days I didn't take my medicine last year or few years back I thought I will feel better if did not take medicine anymore then actually it becomes worse, the lessons learnt in a hard way like "next year then I improve myself", it's really hard and crazy.

I think I'm going to eat now then bath. It's too boring my life I really don't know what to do. I have no one accompanying me to play my Anbernic. I created facebook group about it then no one joins to play together. Life is boring.