Life Repetition

It's the same repeats kind of writings and life, I wonder why it's like this.

It's definitely going to be the end as I will write the same thing again and again? Don't know what cig. going to do to me, the feelings to write, like missing (S) exist, worry of (A) and (W) exist, my feelings are like that. Why I feel like this without having a confirmation if I can be getting them at all? At least I'm being honest and true.

What I don't know about is (R), will she appear into my life next year? I really feel like not going City Hall at All, so wonder where we would meet, because maybe I will be Solo in the end anyway? It's like ever happened.

I'm trying a different writing than a repeat, because have readers I truly hope the readers are (S), (W) and (A), my heart feels like that, if life like my imagination means they are definitely readers? Wow. Why is it I'm not contacted at all? I've left my numbers 2 times. Will I take my O Level or not? I don't want to be a stupid person as profile too, N Level is it like Basic? Can I even work if I have O and A Levels? I really wonder about my body.

I feel a bit like At Night are exercises wearing heavy like Jacket and Hoodie using Bicycle, I really don't know what I would do, it's definitely going to be tiring that it won't happen? It's going to be boring because the turning using bicycle is not smooth(terlanggar kaki kadang2). It's just a fun thing to think of because believing psychic doctors, then it's an action that I don't know my motive or goal yet but the story of my life left dangling into wonders. Could be in the end the clothes all been for Fishing.

My phone number is 80244202, I really try again my life's luck, I hope someone really contact me this time, schizophrenia maybe becomes lesser too hopefully as I have someone to message with? I just want to feel having my life. The boredom like true long duration since every morning until night, I always usually at the Sofa until my Android battery gets low to charge in my Room again and rest after a lot of walking to and fro in my house living room, a walking exercise from restlessness is quite unwilling as fact because legs will be in pain. I really have no life.

My wait from 15 October Until December, hopefully doctor appear and talk to me stuff like School or Not etc. I suddenly don't feel like telling my Father my interest to do O Levels as they let me be, like not caring but maybe it's different memory thing, they maybe have said something in the past then I did not take medication so I didn't remember, as it's a different split memories.

What should I do for my life to be happier? 🙏 It's like a beg for something great to hear about, I want a happy news of my life journey. The rest all been real i want to earn until afford to go vacations to places like U.S.A etc. I can't be a boring life, I have a dream to be successful about, then I have schizophrenia I have yet to recover. I must take my medications truly everyday. I will definitely do my best I can.