Monday, May 18, 2026

Night Time

Reached night time, thinking of buying mechanical pencil, full-scape paper, English essay, then learn English words to highlight the complicated ones and improve my language, haha I'm so excited to study 1 day.

Right now it's boring because haven't Friday yet, the peace still unknown if it will be broken by door knocks about litterbug. I'm so unlucky this hellish feeling still exist. I wonder if I will be fine. I realized that sometimes night time I still write something okay and fine, it's not always something negative impact on me, I just feel sleepy usually maybe when I start writing nonsense. There will be feeling like shame then will feel like deleting them away.

I wonder if doctor will help me about my stress, they seem to be gone from my life for almost 1 year anyway, I really have no one siding me about my stresses, I really surviving on my own.

Tomorrow is another day thinking of cigarette, then money, then litterbug, then I.M.H within this same week, I'm so unlucky my life is like this, I don't know why my parents do this to me like making me anticipate and experience pain and torture in my heart.

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