Have I really grown so old

I'm thinking of my age, is it reality I'm 37 years old, life is unfair how I suddenly can think properly at this age after so long, maybe it's love sick and schizophrenia at the same time?

I sometimes hope like the situation at M.R.T, if many people knew and letting me believe it's year 2025, maybe this sort of thing is happening? Why am I so old to believe? I still feel young, my reaction and body language is it schizophrenic and childish instead of normal age? I feel I move like a 20 years old. My bodyweight makes me think I'm 37 years old again, it's so heavy, I only wanted to be 60kg in the past, then now I feel like wanting 55kg kind of speed.

Why do I age not feeling it and just loss my life like that and everybody seems fine about it? It's only Oct 31 then I'm sad have 31, then it's not November yet, the Soldier Job :( I really want it.

My growing up feels a lot of heat and many sections of microscopic hotness in body, whilst people keep working normally in their life, I don't know how I feel different as something they can't do to help me, why they don't try give me something cold or buy me something cold like hacks red even?

Then I think, it can become easier to detect Meth Addict like making a trend of making cold body: Hacks Red, Vicks Rub, Axe Oil - their scent at young age wearing trendy clothes and have such smell of these, definitely a Meth Addict. Detection can become easier. Then simply imagine their cover is just Baby Powder or Sweet Scent Powder(that's like a lot of lines as the casing). Creating new era of ways "for meth addict" to survive the heat, can create easy detection instead. Meth addict can feel we are caring and trust us instead, knowing and maintaining into getting to know big fish like Those that Sculpture Meth Into A Diamond Shape 💎. I think it's the best way if pretending a gangster and undercover, helping them with these ideas to feel body colder then actually gain trust to keep being in knowledge of Meth whereabouts.

It's the true care people feel, that their body doesn't become cold, then suggesting them to drink Red Bull or Qoo, as it's sweet scent and reawaken them, instead of becoming perspiring and sweaty from meth. Imagine smelly too.

Being too old talking like this maybe is fine, I'm definitely "bukan budak-budak meth/ice" this kind of talks, but can become undercover to know many different types of meth, this spike I experience is only 4 puffs from tobacco cig. then it's more than 3 months maybe the feelings, I really can't do anything.

I hope I can become someone useful in earning in life in any groups, I don't see myself becoming a C.N.B because the training is like a firefighter, requiring to move heavy items and history of broken arm from hit by helmet of drug addict, C.N.B is really dangerous job. My ideas are cool and defensive to people, it's protective to "who knows there's nice meth addict" that don't need to fall sick as they always help people in difficulties? I feel this way.

People live in life with a lot of freedom more than 10 years despite taking Meth, proves just being nice to maintain a knowledge in our hands as something good to do. I have been spiked I don't know how many years and it's by the same person is also odd he kept escaping maybe police don't care at all too.

I hope all these meth dangers ends even if 4 puffs can feel this way, I imagine if sitting beside a rich meth addict that doesn't take care of himself with perfumes then suddenly it's like a spike too? I don't know why the person dare to share meth so many times, isn't it like a rich person, it's not indication of a meth seller? It's definitely fishy he don't really care about meth. If imagine meth, the sandy bits like salt and sugar is really chased on the floor to finish it and consume it, then this man spike like nothing, even to a Man, it's like a waste, if imagine to a Girl - if create the girl h*rny is different, A Man? Is This Guy Secretly A Gay then? What if it's a Gay Old Man? The danger of meth in I.M.H then a Gayman have it to luck on s*x in I.M.H Toilet?

I hope my ideas contribute well to strengthen parts that require defences in Singapore. I know someone reads but I don't know who cares. It's a way to be trusted in the Meth Business.