I really feel like just applying job at Popeyes because of doctor's story I will work there for 3 years and Hacker Job on weekends, or then another story is Soldier Job for 3 years, I wonder which it will be, MahaCrime really appeared making doctor as right about the future, he knew the software will exist first is surprising me how I can remember too maybe because of my interest to become a computer expert? What will make me want to work is the left arm to not feel in pain? Risperidone instead of Injection?
I like how I publish post about Microsoft and About Handphones, it's History of the 2 best appearance in my life, about phone they talk of 3310, it's really my growth luckily having handphone, but then how will I get (S) she didn't care I don't know her phone number at all :( - what am I going to do in life with no jobs, arm pain and right eye in pain, the people story of wanting me to become a Dajjal definitely likes my right eye in pain to match their stories, is it really the small girl alone? I wonder if she makes a male big voice instead to stress me out at that time. I guess somehow it's too late hopefully that people don't think I'm a liar that she likes making toddlers cry, 1 day people will find out, but I wonder if her sister's baby she will make cry secretly, their family need to install a spy camera I think. It's weird to like a baby to cry. I'm shocked how she's not diagnosed as schizophrenia and still able to enter university, the heat and rage from schizophrenia really should be suffering around age of 20+, she's definitely in a bad health condition by now. She will think like the earth exist realm of hell that can merge into our soul feeling it alone I think, then she will believe me and her schizophrenic boyfriend feeling a lot of hot in body, definitely the anger and patience created the heat inside body, definitely smoking cold is the only shortcut for coldness to enter body because if keep taking ice it will finish and doesn't really flow into thin area of body, but smoke will.
Later I will accept her boyfriend again its "boy22223" I think his Plato nickname, then he will ask again or not if I went out with his mother? It's weird he was created like that as a revenge from someone about my experience from his girlfriend, he felt his mother have something going on with me, I only goal for her 3rd guy, that's maybe the last boyfriend or 3rd, depends when I will get (S), it seems to reflect that way a version of fairness to experience. But when I think again maybe I won't add, after questioning me he deleted me off and he added me again, don't know why he was not sent to I.M.H like his girlfriend, it's definitely more than 15 years of believing wrongly like what happened to me, it's definitely sad and bad feelings continuously daily rage heat of patience in body, nobody can do anything about it except smoking. If smoking kills, soldiers of country all would have became weak and lost in war, smoking definitely gives strength as fact if not it's considered as illegal by Law.
I really have nobody to message or talk to causing me to keep writing a blog, I feel bored and sad how the difficulty is not abnormal for my parents to see a human endure this, even when it's schizophrenia, the same strictness happens on me about not giving money, my mother even would believe things like ruqyah when it's just Arabic/Quran statements being spoken that she can do ownself, to pay them $50 I imagine for each treatment, it's better if she have such kind of money to give me straight away, or buy me health supplements, but she claimed I already gotten my g.s.t/assurance package money instead, sadly the stress of my age still have to be like when I was a kid.
I'm definitely an adult that still thinks I'm young due to schizophrenia, lost memory into 1 memory for 17 years, in a different world of continuous suffering of hot pain from being patient, it's too bad I didn't have cig. at that time I kept picking unfinished cig. and reroll them again to smoke, I truly suffer and cig. is something heroic to my life, that it may still be gone from me if I don't work, I would suffer instability again as have no cig.
Schizophrenia causes can't solat maybe from catatonia because of body jerks suddenly, it's weird why I get shocked many times it ever made me thought have lizard in my body moving, or electrical charge landed on my body.
I think to apply for Hi-Ace in the end even if story that I will get heartache from small girl's memory, I really don't know but just waiting for Jobclub as the only solution to my life. Sad have no friends to message and readers maybe are not really able to reach help by talking to my parents, life's too hard this way, it feels like a retarded, I imagine if the sudden jerk is felt at brain, or head, it's the earthquake feelings I feel in my head maybe? Is it the spike of Ecstacy? Meth? Erimin-5? Cannabis? I really don't know but I'm sure meth exist in the spike at that time, 20 July 2025, it's been repetitive too everytime I'm in I.M.H and police did not capture the man over and over again. I'm definitely dead in the spike feelings, uncomfortable everytime.
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