In Bus now, the happiness came back, the anhedonia is really harsh can take away a pleasure of my life. Next time on Thursday will be my 6/8 then means I only have 1 week left. I hope I survive through this hardship, I really need to save money from buying cigs. and that's it. I thought January or February will get Budget money then actually not.
It's Day 158 out of ward on medications today, haven't 6 months yet out of ward, and +48 = total of 206 days on medications. I really hope I get money soon, if not I have to rely on Jobclub $18/day, don't know why they have the heart to discipline into not giving money, I really paid ezlink by myself to take medicines, even phoneline is paid by ownself. I wonder why they won't supply money for me like other lazy kids that's fat and get food at home still, I wonder why they're so luckier in life, even if fat they can taste nice food like McDonalds many times. I saw a fat person with food just now lazily burning bidi then I think hes lucky got food in his hands. I don't know what's the outcome of these strictness in life, I really want to feel better and good in life too.
I will write my Simba data usage on next post because now I'm in Bus still using it. It's like a surprising life finally ending just having to do 3 more Jobclub then I start earning in my life. I'm so happy it's ending, and finally will feel having money. If they give me an extra day to work, I still have +$18 per week then I'm so happy about it, I hope I get support faster than Jobclub though. I'm so angry like a self-damage that I pay everything by myself.
C.D.C voucher is by the govt so I think it's different, it's just advantage in life from govt. The soldier job or hacker job still haven't appeared in my life I wonder when is it, because it's start of real life work, like earning money for real this time, I would be happy doing such thing and earn money.
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