My Simba data is 263mb/400gb, still a lot and I don't have any plans to use it except exploring City Hall to see what's the changes in country as I haven't gone outside for so long, then it's boring so I think of saving money instead.
It's sad how I did not get to buy $99 laptop or $160 Singapore Ghost Stories Book Set but I think it's worth it, I've been using Android anyway and Ghost Stories Set if spending like that is maybe waste of money.
Morning I bought Redbull then bought a prata telor using voucher then done. Later I will read Iqra and I remember the difficult ones like ja ji ju, ha hi hu, and kho khi khu, I still have a new difficult ones like sho shi shu, dho dhi dhu, tho thi thu, zho zhi zhu then I will have da di du, zha zhi zhu that I think is actually dza dzi dzu, because two of it as same spelling is confusing like tsa tsi tsu written as sa si su also, I hope I'm right. It feels like I can read the Quran already but I know I haven't yet able to read it, I'm really sticking to 1 month of this, then if cannot, to be 3 months then if cannot to be 6 months. I really hope the peace will be obtained as I miss (S) a lot.
Yesterday I dreamt of (W) and going out with her, we became very close like best friends and happy together, we gained a lot of enemies when going out then we still are together no matter what people have tried, I'm so happy in the dream. Then I wonder what the dream means. There's a lot of fights in the dream then we still stick together fighting others(not punches but arguments).
I hope I remember Iqra easily it's been only 5 days ago since I started Iqra it reminds me of last year maybe I was doing the same thing and I loss memory of it. I really feel panicky if I have to work or have nothing to do I don't know why there's a rush feelings in my heart, it's like a quick panic that have to go away, then I will end up writing a blog hoping for some difference in the feelings to feel better.
It's still early morning, and I maybe will keep drinking cold water to calm my body then I remember this as my last sticks of cigs. left, will I really be successful this time? The start of 20 days then the nicer feelings will happen in my body, like a scratch in my heart to feel the needs of cigs. goes away from it, then the start of recovery, it's really short sticks and I hope I do well about it.
Yesterday my parents bought burger ramly and chocolate drink for me I feel happy it's rare such thing happens then I experience it, it feels like a gift for going jobclub instead but I'm still happy about it.
I don't remember what else happen during this year of this month but it feels like I got a job at Popeyes then suddenly doctor said I can't work there because have no medicines as I have finished it, taking a lot of it for jobclub "to feel stable" but it's last year, this year I hope I can do it properly and jobclub be smooth for me, only 7 times more to go then I hope I work normally at Popeyes, it's making me feel hard of how to get (S) if I just work at Popeyes, I really end up as a nothing kind of man sadly, and just earning money as much as I can 1 day from working normally, the jobclub really takes times then if everything happens like a repeat and the same, it's like actually the 4th week of jobclub cleaning training then the Popeyes will hire, it's hard why have different stories of doctor in my mind it's maybe "2nd time at the 4th week" then or the answer got edited by the small girl as I kept hearing a girl's voice still?
I'm thinking if I get a job at Popeyes then if I get money from my family and relative, doesn't this mean I actually won't go City Hall at all too? Because job started and it means I won't explore around, I wonder how my heart can don't feel like a rush and feel calm, I really feel like I need the "True Calm Pill" but it's like only doctor medicine is important, they really not wanting to support me about cig. I guess, I really just have to quit "just like that".
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