Day 213 outside ward(261 on medications)

It's been so long I'm outside ward and it's already March, my next working day is tomorrow and it's the 13th one. Now it is raining I feel like a happiness I'm outside ward instead of inside ward, like a nostalgic feeling of a rainy day.

My Simba data usage: 3.59gb/400gb.

Tomorrow is the reset I think, time really flies so fast.

This week will be busy week, Monday work, Tuesday Visit Workplace @ Tampines, Wednesday Off, Thursday work, Friday-Sunday Off. I really hope I feel nothing bad, it's like a lazy feeling due to the q.s inhaler I think, but it's okay I guess just have to keep moving, it's maybe due to injury at my eyelid too that I feel sleepy or heavy eyes.

My viewers dropped into 7 from 8, making me imagine Sakinah only as the main reader, because even after writing "if I split up instead of break-up", Wahdiah and Shahridah still haven't attempt to contact me at all, it's hard remembering so little only and guessing what could be the situation but it's been over 10 years anyway, who would still be around for me? It's really harsh reality the memory loss as something real and continuous, from too angry and too happy, then it means if I remember Wahdiah and Shahridah as innocent, it would be too happy and loss memory too, when I thought they did/said something bad to me it would be too angry and loss memory too, I've been continuously losing memory for the 20+ years of my life and nobody is helping to remind me what my memory should be like, none of my family members helped to tackle the situation like getting Wahdiah and Shahridah back for me, I'm left with nobody even if I take medicines like psychic doctors knowing I would take medicine but then just letting me be without them, we can still go McDonalds together or eat Sushi and sit at Civic Centre but nobody cares about the time and experiences I've lost in life. People only demand that I eat medicine and that's it.

I don't know why I have like a heavy feelings, tomorrow is a working day and I will have to go to feel better in future as will have money, then this q.s inhaler some sort made me feel heavy or the pain in my eyes, it's weird I just surviving through this weight in life.