I have 139 days left to be 1 year outside ward and 91 days left to be 1 year on medications. The pain is finally ending, the recovery is getting closer.
Yesterday smoked 4 sticks only and today only 1 my last stick, means I have smoked very little already and hoping to quit cigarettes.
Yesterday I dreamt a lot but I don't remember my dream sadly, it's something about McDonalds Toys, I was given half cheese burger by Sharon Ang(my primary school classmate) that's very rich and the McDonald toys are Human Size they are very big. I don't know why I dreamt of her eating McDonalds.
In my dream she's a very rich girl already.
I only remembered the last part of my dreams, it was nothing love and relationship, it's just about food and "buying food without me" thing.
Yesterday I planned to write just very short blogpost and no more about Sakinah but I really don't know if my life really can write nothing about her, I miss her like a level of insanity and heat in my body, like she let me burnt instead of being around for me, I don't know what she's doing it's a very good job but she don't even meet me every end of Friday or Saturday, I think the conversation she had with me can be told by psychic how I would talk then I really don't know if I said all "that", but psychic been always right, wonder why information of psychic knowledge about my future status by doctors, then she still don't come back to me to be with me when I'm nothing to become something in future.
Today is Saturday, I'm happy tomorrow is Sunday then after that it's my last working day at Jobclub, I'm really happy it is ending and then a day off, for my first day of work at CleanMark Solutions on Wednesday, I'm happy like crazy of the job I'm getting to do, I really pray for my happiness to be everlasting. I'm reaching the day of information of doctor that I will work maximum salary except off days and I'm happy I would be earning so much even at a 6 hours job. I remember the O.T doesn't take $200 agent money and I get it instead monthly if not my salary is $1400/mth, I'm really happy that I feel rich already before the job start.
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