I remember I ever hack a Singaporean then do the volume maximum of the porn video then leave it on, and chat with her. I lied I admired her because I don't know who she is, then she somehow go out with a 30 year old at 17 years old, cheated of age, then I heard they had sex, it's quite crazy a 30 years old getting a 17 years old pretending younger age. A friend of mine pretended to hack her then got the sex. I didn't care I don't have sex with her though, but my friend could be lying and maybe never had sex with her too.
It's weird doctor only called me to stop me then that's it, I didn't get crime charges I am happy about it too, then the girl's computer is worse, they signed up for a pornography website as a member and support pornography even if a police family. Means I am a nicer person than their family. Maybe this is the reason I don't get caught because after my hack, their computer was checked and this was discovered that they are worse than me.
In the past I only go to i.r.c #xxxpasswords to get free membership that been hacked for username and passwords, i.r.c is nice but then the access to the place is public and everyone can enter and request a username and password and get free membership access instead(means someone else paid for it but we use it).
My strength for this year is to imagine doing dishwashing that doctor said I will complete it the full month except off days and earning maximum, I hope I keep earning to save for 2027 and 2028 because my parents don't give me money, if a 1 storey house can give their child $10K, I wonder why my parents a 2-storey house can't give me even $1000. It's hard I have to endure this pain, like I will think of becoming a businessman in drugs, joining secret societies for drug jobs for money, then I'm already 38 too old for any secret society and probably will become used instead, working is the only pathway in life for now for a good name and getting the status of what I'm capable of scoring during my exam, it is hard nobody cares I am successful at that time and totally loss my stability from Alysha, my confidence to do N level dropped then I dislike she kept forgetting she ever attacked my life I just write her name so she remembers even during her university days, I dislike her stable for education too, means I don't know how to make her fail in university. I heard she just pass to enter university and it's nothing special not really a genius or prodigy mind like me. It's just too bad I have schizophrenia and my highest cert became only N level and I loss the chances with Sakinah altogether, I summarize my success as too low and meaningless that they won't see it as something special that I scored 100% in all subjects. No gifts was given, I would want a laptop but they don't give me anything at all during my high score, I'm sad my life is nothing, I would've experienced something else in life then they didn't support me at all, no wonder I ever thought I'm an orphan and I'm someone they don't really care about.
I know doctor said I will do well in this job, but I'm still feeling the pressure, the injection made my mind better but I gain anhedonia again, like I can't joke for pleasure again, they really killed my laughter and happiness but medicine makes capability to work it's my only choice too if not I will be warded again on 29th June.
People are being mysterious about who reads me, it's too bad for me I guess that nobody cares to talk to my parents, they don't let me see a big ease and big and high peace of mind about money too, I don't know why but Masjid Sultan I hope have something to do about my life about D.U.I.T, they seem more understanding about money matter as real issue even at my age then they didn't give me any support, Puan Hamidah Bahashwan ever came to my house and talk about Club Heal with Doctor Radhiah, it's nothing about D.U.I.T it's too weird they don't recognize that I truly feel in state of danger due to schizophrenia and needed money from my parents. I was younger at that time then now I'm 38 years old they still making me feel this way. The only thing I can be happy about is even if I was ever cheated in business I live in a big house than my ex-business partner. I was teenager and we earned some hundreds but I get 0% and lost my starting money $50, guy became evil and crazy about money leaving me with nothing and I don't support his company anymore.
That man don't know about ddos methods then I think I became a ddoser and ddos my own company to prevent him from earning any more. My efforts I didn't earn from the profits, and it's like a theft of $50 even if include profits is hundreds of dollars. My age at that time around 14 or 15, it is a lot as fact, then I already earn by myself that I don't get to spend a single cent of my earning, it's too bad but luckily I'm an expert in computers and down my own company multiple times until the company bankrupt.
It's so harsh I really don't know what to do, my parents no longer trust in giving me monthly $50, then it's back to $4/day for school, it's sad I actually effort and earned and profit but due to no money back in my life, they no longer give me money in big sum, because of my friend that turned evil. I remember calling him a Kafir at that time his name is Abdillah Sarifudin, he inserted my name into a group of black flag that appears like I'm a terrorist group, something like that, I was angry then I told him to remove my name. He was my best friend at that time we both have high interest in eggdrop and psybnc business in I.R.C.
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