Boring

Listening to Gold 90.5F.M to feel life like it will get better but it's been so many years anyway, currently the lyric is "bring all your dreams to life", haha. I wonder what my dream in life is, it's hard to believe doctor anymore ever since my last jobclub is $914/mth as salary, then to think I would get $1400-$2000 probably just government's money, then I think I won't be a successful person already, my high scoring all became meaningless like just burnt into ashes or dusts.

The last viewers I have 14, I really want to test until only 1 viewer but it's usually like a lot most of the time anyway, it became thinking who reads like I should not blog anymore as it's stressful already.

I hate how I am not recovering yet in life, waiting for 19 June or 29 June is a long time to recover, I sometimes experience head pain anyway thinking of wanting my memories back but I cant get them back, people somehow didn't help by writing a story or piece of paper for me to remember, it's weird I really can't remember anything.

I'm trying to live a life with no lover forever like Pak Ngah, Mak Ni and Bik Minah, it's really weird having no one in life and people seem okay to let me age, I'm sad about it.

It's really sad I can't remember back anything else but memories of beautiful imaginations or wishes as fact. Became a sad feeling listening to Gold 90.5FM, I switched off the radio that I bought for $18 at Bazaar.