My 2nd sister's story appear on news: https://mothership.sg/2026/04/mini-haw-par-villa-woodlands/?fbclid=IwZnRzaART4DdleHRuA2FlbQIxMQBzcnRjBmFwcF9pZAo2NjI4NTY4Mzc5AAEewXQkFaR0ual7HnMHuzXSIlalwJPXS4DKeDr_Vqqu1qC3Xuflc87Zw1YBP0g_aem_sjNK9OSi0rDh4KBPn0YcxQ
She is their new neighbour that complained about it, it seems like doctor knew will come out on news, it's been 1yr+ since her complain then it appear as news. It took so long for town council to interfere.
I have a feeling like I would do the $1400+ salary at this job but $200+ at the same time, I really need psychic answers but none of them attending me, all of them occupied with Sakinah's mental health as she will experience schizophrenia too 1 day, hearing voices that only me and doctor would believe her maybe, people don't think it make sense at all but it's true, it's not that we want to appear as having supernatural powers, it's really the voices exist, I worry how people will judge schizophrenic that didn't lie that voices exist. It's really harsh our life having voices that don't make sense to others, it's really sad like wanting a lie detector to tell that I really hear voices. Don't know why there are only a few cured-from-schizophrenia stories, it's really scary how long it's been taking and my neighbours somehow didn't panic about it, for how long would they be willing to keep taking medicine anyway? Why medicine create loss of voices and heat from body anyway? It's weird like something that don't make sense to me, maybe an ingredient like anti-fever should be the same as medicine's ingredient? I wonder.
I became unstable when I am thinking if I lost so much money at CleanMark Solutions, I really don't know but I think of just trying this new job next week at Amoy Street, at Maxwell M.R.T, it's really harsh I hope I bump into someone at coffee shop, but my life really nothing and have no one that tells me who read, I'm so bored like crazy that I have no friends, it's been so many years but people expect me to be strong to have no friends at all. It's really bad how the expectations of others then I have to be on that level like a force to become okay, it's really having no support of others at all.
I keep thinking about doctor ever saying $1400 as my first salary, if it's this job I am so happy, if it's not I would be sad I kept changing jobs then, but doctor said something about October I wonder what it means, does it mean on October I will get the job, or I will work this job until October? It's really a heavy feeling, I really want to be healthier and feeling no fear, I have no one to talk to.
I hope I gain peace and comfort from the books that I bought that will reach here from 23rd-25th April, I think the books are something that doctor ever said that I will share it to my future children, means I plan to keep it for a lifetime due to Yassin, surah Yasin said as if keep it as a book the house or person will be protected from dangers, I wonder if it's true but I plan to keep it entire lifetime. It's my childhood days kind of rush to have 1 that has Rumi in the book so I can read Yassin by myself daily, I hope I will get to do such thing and become a better man, it's really heavy and difficult phase of my life then I want life to become lighter so the Yassin is something that said as "will make things easier in life", I hope it's true like magic even if it's hard to believe, I really don't want to suffer while working and want working life to be smooth journey.
It's almost 1 year and I receive no support from others, my calculation due to anticipate gifts but it didn't happen, it's just stories of Alysha that lied to me about my future, it's really sad how I became hopeful on a lie and expecting lightness to be given in my life by taking medicine, expectations of lightness is common sense because schizophrenia makes body heavy to work and really difficult like a disability, I hope someone becomes nicer to me and treat me like someone with schizophrenia(the panic feelings) instead of someone that is healthy, it's really sad I got no attention of what I need or want in life but just living taking medicine and thinking no one will get Sakinah for me, it's so much waste of time risking her body to touched by other men, and if soulmate, I already wasted my girl for so many years, I really wasted my life because of their different idea that relationship as Haram so they push nothing that will make Sakinah want me but just trying their best in what they feel as alright. It's really sad to not be with the one we love in life, I feel my life as actually wasted already.
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