The last number of viewer was only 2, then have main website viewed too, I really don't know if it's only 2 person that reads, I dislike how people decide to not contact me in life, the moment of my recovery is nearing but then it could be late 38 years old when reaching 39, but it's impossible because if I'm taking O-level next year, i am 38.5 years old then I should have recovered by then.
My next goal is to buy photo printer, so I can paste in my journal, like a life update matters, so my kids see my handsome face, my face was not seen like 21 years, then people usually have photos nowadays every year but not me, I missed a lot of years, I'm really missing life badly. I remembered about doctor saying I will become President of MUIS and my nenek will see such thing, or it's President of Singapore? Hahaha, it's really funny, I don't see myself as such person at all, I am just growing up even if I'm 38 years old I'm still blogging like a kid, my life of no attention is like this, I really hope I don't become crazy, the suicidal feeling had gone anyway but I think it's 11th May then it will be totally known when it will be gone, it's really like crazy sad feeling in my head.
Sad how I haven't recovered and it's only 20th April, I got so many days left, it feels like I will only work until $200+ earned for my next job, then I don't know if I should apply for job at all, I plan to focus on medicine is why, then my mother will be angry anyway if I'm always at home doing nothing.
Somehow I really hope some changes happens to my life, but people just expect me to live strong by my own self without supporting me anything, I thought something like receiving support is only a matter of time, I've grown until almost 40 years old, still no support of family to have fun in life, they just left me like no life.
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