I have a bad feeling

It's the same feeling like "no smoking" sign was pasted at staircase, it's a bad feeling and I don't feel good, wonder who knocked my door just now, a woman's voice, but like saying my mother's name or "policeee" something like that, I don't know why the feeling is uneasy reminded me of smoking at staircase, it's like stuck in my heart I don't know why or what's causing it. I hope everything is fine.

My life I can't always get in trouble, I don't know why schizophrenia is something uneasy to experience, I thought it's going to be smooth experience already after this injection, there's always something new to think about, it's really harsh the peace got taken away just like that, I feel so angry like the peace imagination of monthly injection just gone.

It's only been about half an hour since my last post then I don't know what it's about the knock on door, why my neighbour was not knocked anyway, why this door? Is it saying my mother's name or I hear voices that made my heart a bad feeling? It's really crazy, I don't feel good at all. I imagine myself to be warded over and over again, I really cant do anything about the forced-treatment if it happens, I'm just made crazy and "to not have a girlfriend" I guess, I just became a useless man most probably in life, it's bad my life experiencing something like this in my heart. I really don't like it at all.