Monday, April 20, 2026

Day 249 outside ward(297 on medications)

I woke up today after hard to sleep for 1hour+ from 3am, means I got like 4 hours of sleep after that.

Today is my injection and to listen to debrief from O.T, then I wonder how long it would be, it's really weird feelings I just want to have my life normally but they are doing this to me.

It's really a boring life I'm having now, I really just want to shower now then go buy Redbull and wait until time to go for injection.

I've been listening to "Dari Bawah" until I fall asleep, I really don't know if I really will become someone successful but the music lyrics give me the energy to try my best in life. I remember I heard this song during B.M.C when doctor say I will keep listening to it over and over again then he's right about it, I really wish I become someone successful in life.

I was energetic on my first few days writing this blog then suddenly I realize I will loss memory and maybe write the same thing, but then it's my usual thing to write the same thing, then I feel bored of blogging now, just counting the days of outside ward and on medications.

I realize that nobody cares of the numbers of days even if I write it down, because it's suppose to create imagination like support to my life because of my successful days then it didn't happen, I end up journaling becoming a secretive person I guess.

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